Single blessedness, I first heard the term when I was in grade 4 (2 decades ago :-) ) from my Religion teacher. According to her, term refers to priest, nuns, monks or even people who are "destined" to be singles for life (old maids, single parents etc). She added, that not everyone is destined to be with someone (married or with a partner), there are people who by their choice (or not) will be single for the rest of their lives.
Now, I was raised thinking that I will be like my parents, you know, find a partner, raise kids,send them to school, provide the needs of the family and all that. I consider that normal. So to me "single blessedness" is somewhat... "nah, that's not for me"
From that day I heard that term up until today (about 2 decades later hehehe), I've been in and out of relationships, I've been dumped and dumped as well and a failed marriage, I find myself "single". I've had relationships with "wife material" ladies but in the end we still broke up. Now I dread the idea of me growing old alone, I want to be with someone.
Then just this new year's eve, it strucked me, maybe I will live a life of "single blessedness", why you may ask....
- I was baby sitting my daughter that time (she spent the holidays with me), she was out playing with her cousins and I was watching her, I thought, I should be inside watching tv or resting... I'm not ready (or willing) to take on the responsibilities of a parent?
- then after that I thought, I want to be in a relationship for the wrong reasons! I just want someone to take care of when I grow old!
- then I also thought that, the relationships I had, I loved in a wrong way, selfish at times. I was told once that I loved the wrong people, but hey maybe the problem is with me?
only then did I begin to realize that maybe i was meant to be single... for life
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